History of Yoga & Yoga as Self-Transformation (YTT - Week Two)

January 27th - 

On Wednesday night, we had a 2 hour lecture from an experienced yogi, Barbara, on the history of yoga.  We were also tasked with reading an article titled "Yoga as Self-Transformation" by Joel Kramer (linked below) for our studies next week, along with a chapter on Ashtanga yoga from one of our books - Light on Yoga by B.K.S. Iyengar.  I knew homework was coming, but I'm an English teachers so reading and highlighting does not phase me one bit.  :)

We sat for 2 hours after I went to a prenatal yoga class at the studio.  It was rough, I had no idea we would be sitting so much.  We had "chairs" (cushions with backs) but sitting on the floor, pregnant, for hours at a time, even with props, is a lot.  I may ask if I can sit in a real chair next time, I just can't seem to get comfortable when we are sitting so long.  Everyone else seems to be struggling with it as well, it's tough for people who are obviously active to come in and sit on the floor and listen for hours at a time.  Hopefully as the training goes on we get to stand and practice poses/alignment more.  I can't wait!

It was also tough because our speaker was SO knowledgeable about the history of yoga, and knew all the Sanskrit terms and got so into it that it was hard for us, the laymen, to follow along.  She had a handout of 27 pages of notes, that she was reading from, but didn't pass it out until the end, and I was so confused about this.  I think they wanted us to just relax and listen to the lecture, but in the eyes of a teacher, this is not helping students to learn.  I would have loved to have the packet, follow along with her, read and highlight it and listen at the same time, learning and remembering as I go.  Now, we all have to go back through the packet again to read/highlight and hope it sticks.  Sitting and listening at 8pm at night (until 9:30pm) is tough after working all day, it just seems like it goes on forever.

The lecture was interesting and Barbara is definitely a magical, amazing person.  The first night of our YTT, during the ceremony, she shared a scarf that a student had given her that had been blessed by the Dalai Lama and passed it around.  I rubbed it on my cheek and my belly and it was just full of energy, so awesome to have that experience.  She also practices martial arts and is incredibly knowledgeable about all facets of yoga and its history, she is really incredible.  I think that if I would have been in a comfy chair, with a little desk (or table) and it was 9am and I was listening without notes, I would have loved it.  I still liked it, I was just tired and uncomfortable.  During the break I sat with my legs up the wall and my new friend Becca joined me, wish someone would have snapped a pic, I'm sure we looked ridiculous but cute.  :)

Here are a few quotes I liked from her lecture (they are not necessarily hers, but people she quoted):

“Yoga doesn’t change us, it simply lets us know who we are.”
“The teacher becomes necessary, becomes yoga.” 
“Our yoga practice saves us from suffering that is to come.
Yoga means "connection of the stars." 
Karma is the “invisible result of the action that shapes a person’s destiny.”
“We are what we are because of what we do or how we do it.”  Our actions are the reflection of our true self. 
“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” 
“Things are never good, and never bad, just interesting.” 
“When you are doing your yoga practice, it should be your yoga practice.” 
“The teacher shows up when the students are ready.”

Something else we did that is worth sharing was a meditation visualization.  We met with a higher being and felt energy pass between us, the being and all of our family and friends in our life that are supporting us on our journey.  Instead of God or a higher power, my being was my Nani (my grandma) whose birthday is today (January 29th) and who passed away 4 years ago when I was unknowingly pregnant with Lemon.  She gave me so much light, love and energy, in my visualization, and was just smiling and smiling, so happy for her life and mine.  It was truly magical and I felt so great after, like she is still smiling down at me and so happy for me.  I loved it.

Namaste friends!

Baby Boy - 22 Weeks

I'm feeling good this week just really tired.  I haven't had much of a chance to put my feet up and every night after work (and in the mornings) I am just dead tired.  I am still out of breath, still have this weird cough but the tired is just getting to me.  Hopefully I can snap out of it because I have no vacation coming soon!

I do hate January though and am happy it's warming up a bit here in Arizona (bring on the mid 70's!).  I can't wait until February and Spring, my favorite time because it's almost SUMMER!!

Yoga teacher training started last week (see my other post) and that could be why I am so tired.  I also have been putting the finishing touches on Lemon's room (that post is coming next week!) and just doing general house and life stuff - it's all too much.  I have been rethinking a lot of the jobs I've decided to pile on myself but nothing can be taken away so I will just have to adjust, and go to bed earlier.  Even when I'm dead tired I stay up until 10:30-11pm, I have to break this habit for sure.

New glitter floor hangs until our rug comes!

My boobs are still huge and now they are doing that thing where if I sit and slouch, they can rest on my belly!  I go to the doctor today so see how much I've gained but so far it's only 13 pounds total so that's pretty good.  I found this picture from when I was 23 weeks with Lemon and feel like I was bigger in it, so that makes me feel better too.  I gained 45 pounds or so the first time and it was tough to lose it, I just don't want to have to work that hard (with two kids!) again!  Hahahaha.  Trying to stay healthy and fit this time around, still going to my regular intermediate yoga classes, and walking 1-2 days a week at school.  I just hope I can keep both of these up, in light of me being so sleepy!

I may just stop this post to take a quick cat nap at my desk since I don't have kids in my room.  Here I go . . .

15 minutes later and I'm back, feeling the same as before, ha.  Oh well . . .

We were off on Monday for Martin Luther King Jr. Day and it was lovely.  We got to take Lemon to her Music Together class, donuts after and then later to the dentist.  It was her second appointment (she went with me this summer) but her first appointment where she got her teeth cleaned!  It was SO cute and she did so well, no tears and was such a brave girl.  However, be warned parents, during the cleaning she kept licking the cleaner (it was orange flavored) and swallowing and the hygenist didn't tell her not to swallow it (and neither did we, didn't think of it) so on our way home, in the car, she threw up!  I pulled over at the stop sign feet from our house because she said she was going to throw up, got her out just in time and she threw up in the street by our house.  I asked if she was sick and she said no it was the dentist who made her sick.  She was fine after so I'm pretty sure it was the swallowing of all that cleaning stuff.  Poor baby!!

 This dentist was my dentist as a kid, after we moved here from Oregon, so fun to see him also checking her teeth!!

And then of course we had to play dentist after, all afternoon until dinner.  Thank goodness she just wanted to check Daddy's teeth!

Our Recycling Club helped to weed one of our three gardens at school during lunch.  These kids are so awesome!

Putty and the evolution of a wink while I made chicken enchiladas one night (she can wink now, so cool!):

Playing, a bath and snuggles before teacher training:

I didn't want to leave!

Ian took Lemon downtown to find some art and they had a fun adventure on Saturday while I was at teacher training.  And Friday, while I was gone, they had fun with Miranda and Jonah at our house.  I'm sad I missed all of it!

Icees at Target and putting on a show at Barnes and Noble before dinner with friends on Saturday night:

Sunday night ice cream date at our favorite, Sweet Republic!

 Lemon was yelling, "I want chocolate, I want chocolate!"  Hahhahaa

A very busy weekend full of teacher training and family fun!  I'm happy it's over and that next weekend I don't have training!

Yoga Teacher Training - Week 1

January 22nd & 23rd -

I am tired.  Not tired because I'm pregnant or tired because I have a full time job or tired because of teacher training - I am tired because of all of it.  I could barely open my eyes this morning and feel like I could sleep for days, although I had a hard time sleeping last night.

Our family is also having a bit of a tough time trying to work out the logistics of me being gone so much.  Lemon is going to bed later and later (she was still up at 10:30 last night) and doesn't quite get what's going on.  Ian is overwhelmed, I think, in his new role as doing everything solo for these nights/weekends I have training.  Things are just weird and we are trying to find our new normal, but I'm happy this week is an off week and I only go on Wednesday night - we need to relax a bit.

I love the training, I've gotten to know the people in my room better (there are 15 of us), and surprisingly enough not all of them are there to be yoga teachers.  It's funny, being a teacher myself, because you think that people taking a teacher training want to be teachers, but for most of them that's not the case.  Some came to find themselves, others to find something new, others to get away and some to be teachers, like me.  Some are moms, some work full time, some are retired and some have medical issues - it really is a refreshing group of very real people that I am excited to get to know better.  It's great because I already know that Desert Song is amazing, the teachers are awesome and know I get a chance to spend time and grow with some actual students, that are equally just as awesome.  That is so much fun.

It's all the other life stuff I am trying to put into place so that I can have this amazing experience and fully be committed to it.  I'm feeling, at the moment, like I took on too much, shouldn't be away, mom guilt and wife guilt - and like quitting to be honest.  I won't, but I do feel like it sometimes.  How can I make this all work?  How can my family do this?  Will we be ok in the end?

It's only 7 months and it will fly by.  I keep telling myself this.  It's also a dream of mine that I've had for 10 years, how dare I feel this way and complain?  What the heck?!  I'm just conflicted.  Conflicted and tired.  Soooooo tired.

This past week we did our opening ceremony, a yoga practice together (that was called out to us in Sanskrit, which was interesting) and then we watched the movie Yoga Unveiled.  It was interesting buy very long and there was a lot of sitting, so my body got tired and my eyes were heavy.  I took notes to stay attentive and that helped, and learned about the history (and about modern medicine adopting yoga techniques) through the film.  I thought I'd share some parts I enjoyed here, with you.  It's an interesting movie, watch it in parts so you don't get bored.

I will make it through, I will, I'm just so sleepy today!!  Hang in there Allison, you can do this!!!

Yoga Unveiled insights:

• 20 million people are doing yoga in the US, not many in India – more in the west than in India.
• Yoga is joining the finite and the infinit, the micro with macrocosm – join and connect the whole individual to original blessing/creation.
• “If you do yoga long enough, you live it.”
• “Yoga brings you back to a feeling of what life is all about.”
• “A gift for us to receive this gift of our lives.”
• India has a preoccupation with the spirit and America has a preoccupation with the body – bring together the two.
• “Be in communion with nature and the world will be a nice place to live.”
• Yoga originated in India 5000 years ago, Indus civilization.  Found seals in yogi postures – yoga asanas.
• The same people who created the yogi tradition also created architectural, engineering and trade with Mesopotamia. 
• Asanas today connect us to ancient India – an entire civilization that was yogi based.
• Branches of yoga:
• Consciousness – the goal is to realize the inner self. “I think therefore I am."
• Bhakti yoga – yoga of devotion and connection to God.  “Religion is based on belief and having someone else do it for you.  Spirituality is based on personal experience and effort.”
• Karma Yoga – Fully committed – regard our life as service to others without an expectation of reward.  Albert Schweitzer, Gandhi and Mother Theresa – examples of people who did everything for other people.  
• Jnana – Yoga of wisdom.  Letting go of what is unreal, focusing on what is real.
• Raja Yoga – meditation.  Stopping the mind, turning the TV off.
• This part of yoga has 8 parts:
• Ashtanga yoga – non violence, truth, no stealing, celibacy, without greed. – abstention. 
• Observance – how we live when no one is looking.
• Asana – posture (actually sitting without distraction for meditation)
• Breath control – pranayama
• Withdrawl of senses – Control of senses, turn them inward.  Stop hearing sounds, eyes close. 
• Concentration
• Meditation
• Contemplation
• Tantra Yoga – holistic approach to health and well-being.
• Kundalini Yoga – fundamental to Tantra - awakening of psychic power within us.  We can’t practice by ourselves, this one requires a guru.  This world is a manifestation of the ultimate reality.  There is nowhere else to go.  If the body is the temple, I need to keep it clean and tidy.  Prepare the body for spiritualization.
• Hatha yoga – forceful or disciplined practice.  Late arrival to yoga history 1000 years old.  Meditation is crucial to hatha yoga. Yoga was taught to children in the forest because the teachers lived in the forest.  Was a way to connect to nature.  Why we have nature names for poses – like pigeon.
• Mantra Yoga – repeating over and over to calm mind, consciousness
• Ama – not fully digested food, also experiences and emotions based on events in our life.  We haven’t taken time to process them so they impede life energy – prana.  Then disease develops.  Purification reverses process.
• Meditation and yoga do not magically fix, they are actually ways of being.  Rotate in consciousness and ability to see the world in a new way.
• Mind and heart connected – mind can heal and heart can heal.
• Doctors teaching the healing power of yoga – kind of an oxymoron to support alternative medicine.  But, through studies like the heart trial that uses meditation, yoga, diet and exercise – then there was evidence for benefit for patients.
• Yoga and meditation can teach you to learn how to live with pain that won’t totally erode the quality of your life.
• Physicians should care about patients but now it’s too fragmented, no one is responsible for the whole body anymore.  Psychiatrists aren’t even trained to so psychotherapy anymore, they just use drugs to “cure” patients.
• Measurable benefits of yoga as we get older – blood pressure, bone density – health preserving therapy.  Cheap and you can do it yourself. 
• Meditation and yoga are how you live your life moment to moment.  We are never really in our body, “we live a short distance from our body.”  The mind and body never were two – they are one in the same – whole.  We must be in this moment, this is the only moment we are only really alive in – don’t identify with your disease or prognosis.  “I don’t know who I am, but I know there’s a capacity for awareness that allow me to direct my life and work with my illness that allow me to move in way of greater well-being.”
• Be knowledgeable of ourselves and not allow disease to be present in our lives.  Experience a state of wellness and then make the right choices. 

Moms on Mondays - Jennifer from Hawks and Honey

Today on Moms on Mondays, I am featuring a local mama who I've had the pleasure of also meeting, Jennifer from Hawks and Honey!  She is a hard working lady, with two cute girls, who makes designs inspired by her own artwork.  Read her post below and then go shop!

What is the name of your shop and how can we find you? 

Hawks and Honey is my apparel and blog, named after my daughters.  Hawk for my oldest, her middle name is Chetan which means Hawk Spirit.  She's named after a family of hawks that circled our home the week of her birth.  Honey is for my younger daughter, named Basil.  The bees were all over my basil plants during her pregnancy and her nickname is Basil Bee.  You can also find me on Instagram and Twitter. 

Tell us about what you make/sell in your shop.

I hand write and hand draw all my tee shirts and silkscreen them in my studio by hand.  Everything I sell is made by me! I have t-shirts and toddler leggings, and am finally extending my selection to include skirts and dresses! I also paint and do photography, so sometimes those are incorporated into my shop or blog as well.

How/why did you start making these products and open this shop?

I started silk screening years ago, but restarted a new brand in 2013 so I'm still pretty small, and like it that way.  I still enjoy sewing and silk screening, it's small enough that I'm not overwhelmed with orders or burnt out.  I'm an overall creative person, and have a hard time locking myself into one line of work. I like having my own businesses where I can focus on what I want when I want.

How long have you been in business?

My apparel business has been around for about a year and a half, and I'm excited to see what happens next! Currently, my apparel can be found in Made Art Boutique and online. But hopefully, over the next year, I can expand into a few more local shops.

What is your background (college/career/etc.)?

I'm actually an Art Teacher at a private high school.  I went to the University of Arizona and have a Bachelors of Fine Arts in Art Education, with an emphasis in painting.  I'm a mixed media artist and usually keep it pretty close to home utilizing images I've photographed and incorporating those into my acrylic paintings.  Although, most recently, I've been juxtaposing my love of the ocean with my love of the desert.

Tell us a little bit about your family.

I have two little girls five and two.  I've taken a few years off from serious painting because I was focusing more attention on my kids, lately they've matured to a point where they can entertain themselves a bit more, and work on projects with me so I've been able to start painting again.  My husband works full time and that allows for me to mostly stay home.  Because of that flexibility, I was able to focus on starting this company and experimenting with my creative energy.

How does this company help your family? Or you?

Hawks and Honey helps my family by giving me that alone time to focus on my personal goals.  It shows my kids they can support themselves with their skills.  It helps me remain sane.  I need to be creating something, and making something, to feel purposeful.  This business allows me to do that, and thankfully I've finally reached a tipping point where it's not just a hobby, but also it provides a small income for my family.

Did you ever think you'd be doing this? What did you think you'd be doing instead?

I actually thought I would be doing exactly this.  I knew that I wanted to teach art, but more as a back up or part time.  I knew I wanted to make things since I was little, unfortunately I don't think people take art seriously enough to encourage kids and adults to focus their creativity on it.  I spent a lot of my education believing I needed a back up plan that could support me if my art didn't.  Not that I think there's anything wrong with that necessarily, but I know a lot of creatives that have wasted money on an education they're not using, because they are so good at their art they didn't even need it.  I think not going to school and interning or apprenticing with someone successful is a much better idea for the arts industry.  

Does anyone help you with your shop?

I have friends and family that support me.  Sometimes that's helping with my kids so I can focus, other times it's offering a t-shirt design that makes me laugh, and sometimes it's hanging out with me while I cut fabric.  Help takes a lot of forms and I appreciate all of it.

How do you find time to run your shop and create products? 

I don't.  I forget to wash my hair some days and sometimes my floor isn't mopped.  And sometimes, my kids watch too much Netflix.  It's really challenging, but I just make a list and do what I can.  In serious production mode, before a local event or show, I'll stay up late at night after the kids have gone to bed and work until 2am; but thankfully I haven't had to do that in awhile.  And now, I just have a daily goal of making one thing (or things), and if I do that I'm happy with myself.

What do you love about this businesses?

I love that my ideas become real, physical things people wear, and I love that people connect with what I'm saying or making.  It's really exciting to participate in a community of creative people and get feedback and support from other local creatives.

What is the most challenging part of this business?

Being original.  Especially with Instagram and Google, I feel like anytime I come up with an idea I have to check and make sure no one else is doing it.  It's disappointing when you arrive at something independently but someone else is already there. When that happens, I try to focus on my paintings because I know that there are so many levels to my work it's going to be original no matter what.

Where do you see your shop in the future?

I see myself living in Hawaii and working from home, sewing and printing daily and shipping items to the mainland or selling at artist markets there.  I love the desert but the ocean is calling.  {Sounds like a dream!}
Tell us your favorite product or your most favorite thing you've created?

Right now my mermaids and cacti paintings are my favorite, and I'm so excited to show everyone what I'm going to do with them next!

Do you have any advice for future mom-entrepreneurs?

My advice is to find your industry and immerse yourself in it.  Find people doing something that you respect and ask for help.  I know I've had so much help from people in this community, and I'm so grateful they took the time to show me something and teach me something.  They're generosity did not go unnoticed, and I can only speak for myself but I think paying it forward is something real and accessible.  I know I'd be happy to mentor someone interested in learning how to do what I do.  I'm really believe that we can all succeed and I love the saying, "don't compete, collaborate." Find your community and work with those people, don't try to work against them; they're there to support you and likewise.

What are some of YOUR favorite shops/products, besides your own?

A few of my favorite Phoenix shops are:  Indie Nook - witty apparel, Meesh One Love - essential oil blends and malas, Miss Veronica Jean- adorable jumpers for littles, Mer*Made Jewelry- earthy gems and metals jewelry, Moss and Mountain - 1970s vintage-y apparel for kids and Strawberry Hedgehog Soap - vegan, chemical free, soaps that smell amazing.

Thank you Jennifer, so happy to have you!!  :)

Yoga Teacher Training - First Night

January 20th -

Last night I went to my very first class of yoga teacher training through Desert Song.  It wasn't necessarily a class, but a sort of welcoming and opening ceremony.  It was magical and I still can't really put into words what happened or what I was feeling, there were just too many feelings.

Before class we were asked to bring artifacts to place on an altar, to dedicate our journey.  I had printed out pictures at school to bring, but then forgot them, so spent a half hour at home trying to print.  (Why is it that your printer never works when you need it to?!)  Ian ended up running to Staples for me because I was about to give up, I was frustrated.  I felt rushed, sad about leaving my family so late at night, sad about missing bedtime with Lemon and just feeling like I had no time, and knowing that I'd probably feel this way for the next 6 months.  I even planned to go to a yoga class before the training started, but didn't end up making it and I think I was mad about that too, even though I enjoyed being home with Lemon.  So much to do to get out of the house, even if it's just you leaving!  Mom life.

It was just all too much.  I think I was nervous, excited, but also overwhelmed - this is HUGE time commitment and I have a little one at home (which equals no time).  A little one that needs me because so there will be another little one, and in these last few months I have just with Lemon I will be gone doing this training.  I feel guilty.  This is my dream, yes, but the timing is crazy - once I had made the decision to do this I found out I was pregnant.  It just seems like so much at once - do I really have it in me?  Can I really do this?

I spent the last half of last year preparing for my PE certification test and feel like I am about to embark on the same thing again, but tougher.  I do have extra time, I do, but I also have a lot going on outside of my actual job as well - and my family.  I know it seems like I am complaining but I just had to put my worries somewhere, so here they are.  Time, ugh time!  Why do I feel like I never have any?

I don't give up on things.  I won't give up even at the cost of myself and everyone around me.  When I was 17 I lived in a 3 bedroom apartment with 8 people and was the only one in college - I made it through and graduated at 21.  I couldn't figure out nursing with Lemon, she was probably starving for the first month of her life, but I stuck with it and did it for over 3 years!  I just don't quit.  I will finish this, but I may be dragging (super pregnant!) and tired at the end.  But, I will finish damn it.

So, I was a ball of emotion last night and instead of being excited I was just kind of grumpy, maybe even teary, as I walked out of the house at 6:30pm.  I just didn't want to leave my baby.

Then, I got there.  We waited in a room for about 20 minutes and then they came to get us, walked us around the building, and two by two we were "smudged" with sage by two of the instructors.  We then walked into a room where candles and mats were set in a circle, and our names were on folders prepared for us.  I found my spot and sat down, then couldn't stop coughing.  I've had this weird cough for about a week (and it has made it a bit hard to breathe), and with the sage and maybe my nerves, I just couldn't stop.  I felt like I was bothering everyone but couldn't help it, and after awhile (and some water), the tickle finally went away.  It was so weird but it was a culmination of everything - rushing to get there, waiting and then being there - my body must have manifested a cough to deal with it.

The teachers welcomed us, blessed us with sweet grass, we anointed each other with oil made by my yoga teacher, Meg, then it was time for us to share about ourselves and our artifacts that we brought.  I knew I was going to cry, I am 5 months pregnant and this has been a dream of mine for 10 years - it was inevitable.

Sure enough, I did.  They said "welcome Allison" but I just kept talking and forgot that they were going to say that after I introduced myself.  Then, I started crying.  I had so much to say, so much to tell but it was so hard to get it out.  The dim lights, the candles, the smells, the experience - it was just too much.  Overwhelming doesn't even describe what I felt - I need a new word.  Magical?  Cloudy?  Spiritual?  I have no idea - it was just a culmination of my night at home, my drive there, the blessings and listening to everyone's own story - it was just too much.  Too much!  (Can I say that enough?!)

I shared how I started doing yoga with my friend Ginni, who had the idea to start a club at school for the kids.  Then, how my step-mother, Leslee, sent me to Desert Song with her friend Peri because she told me it helped her (as she was slowly dying of cancer).  How when I went there, almost 10 years ago, this became a dream of mine, to be a teacher, to be like the amazing women sitting here teaching us.  We were supposed to offer something to the group, and I told them that I never imagined that I would be here, 37 and 5 months pregnant, so I offer flexibility because life sometimes doesn't go as planned, and compassion for others because when I get really big or am not there, I am going to need it.  I also told them that I have been a high school teacher for 16 years and that I offer my gift of teaching, if I can help in any way I can by sharing my talent/gift of teaching with them.  Then, I told them about Lemon and Ian, and how they are home and I am here, and that I have all of these crazy ideas and they always support me.  I placed my pictures on the altar and then sat back down.  At that moment, I was worn out.

We discussed some business and then it was over, and I walked to my car just like I've done a million times before, just like I had come out of a yoga class.  I couldn't sleep, I was worried and excited and just can't believe that tonight begins my 6 month long journey into being the kind of yoga teacher I've always wanted to be, and learning from the ladies that I admire so much.

It's ok to do something for yourself and be totally selfish.  It's ok to be a mother to a young child, and also to be a pregnant mother, and do something just for you.  It's alright to leave your family, even if you don't want to, to chase your dreams.  It's ok to do something challenging and tough, even at 37 and pregnant, when I could be taking it really easy.  It's ok to leave Lemon a couple of times a week, even if she has a brother coming and these will be our last months just the three of us.  I keep telling myself all of these things, but also feel as though I will be missing so much, and guilty that I am leaving when maybe Lemon needs me most.  I don't know, but I will keep my goal in mind and continue on my path and do what I've gotta do, FOR my family.  It's just like going back to work after having your babe, it's hard at first, you dread it, but you find your rhythm.  I hope to find my rhythm in this too.

I am obviously not speechless but feel as though all the words I've written just don't truly express how I am feeling.  I can't find the right words at the moment, but hopefully I will as my journey continues.

I loved the community feeling that was present tonight, the sharing of our stories and getting to soak everyone's in and make it a part of our story as well.  All of these things we hear, just like what the kids tell me at school, become a part of me and I carry them with me as well, on my journey, just like you carry them on yours.  I am a part of all of the people in my class now, and they are a part of me.

My intention for my training to be a yoga teacher is to do something just for me.  This is a dream I've had for a long time, and I am so lucky to have the opportunity to follow it.  I need to stop feeling guilty, sad or grumpy and remember why I am doing this, for myself.  For all the mamas out there who lose a bit of themselves when they have a baby, for my family, for my well-being, for my sanity.  I can do this (I can do anything!) and I can't wait to see where this journey takes me.  Thanks for being along for the ride!